I'm leaving ... on a jet plane ....

Yep, we'll be getting our PINK any day now! Well, any day next week, hopefully. Our 2nd dna test was done last Friday, so now we just wait for our appointment date! Woohoo! My best guess would put us in Guatemala City in mid-February.

We're still debating on whether or not to take Maya with us. My heart says yes, yes, she MUST go with us. No way could I survive a whole week without my little Punkin'. But then my brain says "are you completely freakin' NUTS?!" You want to take a screaming, tantrum-throwing toddler on the plane to a country where you don't speak the language, where she looks more like the average citizen than you, and where she's bound to continue her habit of running from you at the worst times?! And to top it off, you want to take TWO of them on the plane ride home? What the H are you thinking?!?!"

heart: Sigh. I still stress over being an hour late coming home from work and missing that extra hour of time that could have been spent with my baby. How can I leave her for a week?!?!

brain: But we need bonding time with Maria, and it's not fair to Maria to bring along a 2 year old that will demand mommy's every waking moment. Maria deserves mommy's full attention, and this is probably the only chance she has to get it.

ARGHGHGHGH!!! I'm almost to the point of letting fate decide ... when it comes time to make reservations, if we can get a suite or even 2 adjoining rooms, where Maya and Maria can have individual attention from at least one parent at a time, then maybe we can handle taking her with us. If that's not possible, then maybe fate is telling me she should stay home. I try to delude myself into thinking we want to take her for her sake, but it's so obviously a ruse .... I want to take her for MY sake! She'll never even remember the time apart if she stays, or the trip if she goes.

I made the mistake of asking her tonight, "do you want to go with Mommy and Daddy to Guatemala, or do you want to stay with Gran?" Silly mommy ... what 2 year old wouldn't pick GRAN when she knows she can have her way all the time at Gran's house?! Doesn't Gran always have the BEST snacks around at all times?! Heck, I want to stay at Gran's, too, and be spoiled completely rotten, and have my every whim catered to!! When can I get some Gran time, hmmmm? I really do adore my MIL... and I'm not exaggerating when I say she would coddle me just as much as she would Maya if I stayed with her a week.

I've already asked a few people if they would be interested in going with us, then I would have a babysitter to help watch Maya, but no luck so far. Oh well, still a few more weeks to decide. I'll think about it tomorrow......

Guess what started today?!

Scene: in the bathtub.
mommy: "stand up, Maya, so we can wash your behind."
maya: "BUT WHY?"
mommy: "because it's stinky."
maya: "BUT WHY?"
mommy: "because you've had a few stinkies today and we need to clean it."
maya: "BUT WHY?"
mommy: "maya, we need to wash your bottom. stand up, please."
maya "BUT WHY?"
mommy: "BECAUSE I SAID SO!"

sigh. Let the good "why's" roll.

Two and a half really is a fun age, though. Maya is like a sponge, and just seems to absorb everything around her (including the few, uh, not so nice words mommy MIGHT have let slip.)

The other thing I thought was really cute was:
mommy: "Maya, your hairband is sooo cute!"
maya: "I like it."
maya: "not really. hehehe."

She really does not like things in her hair. She will keep the little elastic bands I use for ponytails, but removes all clips and bows and headbands and anything else I have tried. I think she would take the elastic bands out too, but she hasn't figured out how to do that without hurting her head.

She's growing up too fast!!! How do I slow it down?! Oh, and she's learned the art of little white lies already. I must admit I loved the stage before she learned how to lie. I could just ask her "Maya, do you have a stinky diaper?" And she would look at me and nod. Now I ask her the same question, and she's figured out to say no..... even if the true answer is yes.

Maya definitely has the make believe thing down, too. She likes to pretend she's a bee stinging us to make us cry. And tonight I told her to look sad and she made the cutest little frown EVER! It was absolutely adorable, so we had to go show daddy. I have got to get a picture of it, and of course will post it whenever I do. I foresee a Tony award in her future....

The Christmas that almost wasn't.....

Since I've been in a bah-humbug mood all season, I had yet to wrap the first gift when my family showed up on Christmas Eve for our celebration. My mother lives in C, along with my brother and his family, and C is about 1 1/2 hours from my house. My mother's house, in particular, is about 1 hour 40 minutes or so from my house. We invited mom to stay with us the week of Christmas as we certainly didn't want her to be alone this year. So after supper, I tell my brother I need a few minutes to wrap some gifts before we start the gift exchange. They tend to Maya while I disappear upstairs for about 15 minutes. I came back downstairs and tell my mom that I cannot find Maya's gift from her, and I wanted Maya to open it while my family was here. I looked several more times that evening and really get worried, as there are two other Santa gifts that I got along with the gift from my mom. I had other things at home to give her, but these were 3 of her main items, and I was to the point of tears when I still couldn't find them around 8:00 that evening. I even left to see if I could find ANY store still open that late. Walgreen's was the ONLY store open, and they were packed, and all the toys were quite picked over, so no luck there. So I go home and try to make do with the pitiful offering of stocking stuffers and a few other measly gifts for Maya, all while fighting the tears.

Finally, around 10:00, it hits me ... I remember where the gifts are. I bought them when in C visiting mom earlier in the month, and I remembered putting them in HER closet to hide them from Maya. Oy! I call my brother, who is back home by this time and ask him to ride out to mom's house (only about 3 miles for him) and see if they are still in her closet. Sure enough, there they are! So I tell Frank I am on my way down, as I cannot STAND not getting them for Maya to have Christmas morning.

My nephew meets me in CL, which is about 40 minutes from mom's, so it saves me a good amount of time. But I still do not get back home until 1:00 a.m. Chrismtas morning with the gifts. I put them out and head on to bed, a happy Mama! I do realize that Christmas is not all about the gifts, and that Maya would not have had a clue if they had not been found, and she would still have been ecstatic to have the few other things we had for her. So this trip was really more for me than for her. But I truly would have been devastated. Christmas was saved .....

This gift was not in Columbia, so we still had her big item at home. But I wasn't about to go outside at 6:30 a.m. when Maya woke up to find this Santa gift ... we waited until E's mom was able to come by, and she "found" it outside from Santa!



And this face was definitely worth the drive to pick up the Cabbage Patch doll!


These are from Christmas Eve with my family.

...for Sarah

Ok, Sarah, your Christmas is now complete! Here's the lastest pictures we received of our darling Maria, who should be coming home in January, 2008! I believe these were taken in September at 6 months old.





And here's a recent one of Maya. This is the picture we used in our Christmas cards this year:



I'm trying hard to get out of the 'bah, humbug' spirit I've been in this month. I think it's getting better. I know I'm excited that my mom will be coming tomorrow to stay with us for a week or so. She was supposed to come yesterday, but she got sick and had a fever and didn't want to expose Maya to anything. But the fever is gone and she just has the cold symptoms left, so I insisted she come stay here anyway so we can keep an eye on her and make sure she is taken care of. We've all battled a recurrring bug that has been floating around our house since Thanksgiving, and have all just completed our rounds with antibiotics, so I think we're safe from mom's bug.

I am excited about Omi (my mom) and Gran (E's mom) both being here Christmas morning to see Maya and her Santa toys. Gran drove over last year on Christmas morning, and I'm sure she'll do the same this year. I have waited a long, long time to be a mom, and I cannot wait to see my little girl's face light up when she gets up on Christmas morning! I will make my usual Chrismtas morning casserole and have the coffee pot brewing. Then we'll all hang out in our jammies until almost noon, when it will be time to get ready to go visit E's family for our Christmas celebration with them. My family will all be coming up to my house tomorrow to celebrate with us and mom. So I think I'm starting to get over my doldrums for the moment.

We wish you all peace, love, and joy this holiday season, and here's to an awesome 2008!

Maria is coming home soon!

We got a call Saturday from our agency, and Maria should be coming home in January! woohoo! Maya is finally going to be a big sister!!!

We got out of PGN on Friday, which is actually about a week earlier than I had predicted. We were kicked out around Oct 18 and resubmitted the next day, but I was sure it would take at least another 8 weeks before we got out. I'm so glad to say it ain't so!

We still have to wait for the reissued birth certificate, the 2nd dna test and results, and our appointment date to appear at the US embassy in Guatemala, but at least an end is finally in sight! So Maria will be 10 months old when we bring her home. Maya was 9 months old, and I must say, it is a wonderful age.

I was just telling E tonight that it's hard to remember Maya being so small when we got her. She was running around the living room between daddy and the orange and her toys and mommy. Everyone is so surprised at how well she speaks now. She will talk up a storm if you have time to listen, so we make time!

We went to see Omi Saturday and took Maya to see the Christmas lights at the zoo. Traffic was horrendous, and while I'm on the subject, let me just express my complete displeasure with the extremely rude, boorish and completely inane drivers who think it is perfectly ok for some of us to sit in traffic over 1/2 an hour to take a certain zoo exit while they zoom up the left lane and weasel their way into the front of the traffic line. I wish I could remember the NC license tag number I tried to memorize ... the one that so rudely pushed his way into line even though we were trying not to let him in. I'm all for being curteous and letting people get in front of me, but I'm not exaggerating when I say we were in traffic for more than 1/2an hour to go about 1/2 a mile. But it was worth every second of the traffic agony to see the big smile on Maya's face when she saw the elephants!

One of her favorite movies is Jungle Book, and we practice our marching with the elephant military patrol. She also still loves Garfield and Cinderella. I heard from a little birdie that she will be getting Cinderella III from some of her favorite relatives who happen to live in Nebraska.

We went to a neighborhood Christmas party last night. It was at our friend's house, and their whole neighborhood has a Luminary Night each year on the 2nd Sunday in December. It gets larger each year, and we have so much fun taking a hay ride around the neighborhood, eating snacks at host houses, and meeting with our friends each year. Maya is still afraid of Santa, who she calls "Ho Ho". She will be chattering away and if you ask her if she wants to go see Ho Ho, she'll freeze up and say "No!" very quickly. I hope she gets over her fear soon .. I can't wait to get pictures of her in Santa's lap!

E, Maya and I all wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Bye, Papa

Maya's Papa: May 13, 1922 - November 1, 2007

Let me tell you a little about my dad. He loved, loved, LOVED his family. And his grandchildren could do no wrong. Some of my favorite memories of him include impromptu trips to Mr. Smith's for a banana split, sitting around listening to him talk with any of his siblings about their growing up years (there were 12 chilren in all), playing cribbage with him (and catching him cheat!), dad taking me shopping for clothes when he got an unexpected rebate or insurance dividend, and going swimming at the local military base.

Dad was the organized one in the family. Mom and I haven't a clue how to do that. Lucikly for my brother, who handles most of dad's paperwork, dad had a folder for everything and a place for every folder. Whoever gets to take care of me and my mom will not be so lucky. You'll have to search every kitchen drawer, every nook and cranny, to find the important papers we never get around to filing. I wish I had inherited that organization gene, but alas, I didn't.

Dad was proud to be a veteran, and he was very proud to have served in two wars, WWII and the Korean War. He wasn't happy with the state of today's military. He thought the soldiers had lost their respect for military rank, and for serving in general. But he was so proud to have been a part of it when he was. He met my mom in Germany, and looking through his files I found a picture that he had labeled as the day he had to leave mom and come home. They were not married yet, and they couldn't get the paperwork processed in time for her to come with him. He came home in August, 1959, and she wasn't able to come here until late October of that year. His note under the picture said it was the longest 2 months of his life. They celebrated their 48th anniversary on October 26, and I'm so glad he made it past that point.

I asked my mom what it was about him that attracted her to him. Rumor had it she wouldn't give any of the German men the time of day, much less the American soldiers coming through. She replied that all of the other men always kidded around too much, always acted immature, and always wanted something. But dad would always talk about his family, and his mother, and how she had raised 12 children and 2 of her many grandchildren. He talked about sending money home to his family (instead of gambling and drinking it away as so many others did). And she told me something I had never heard before ... they had actually broken up for a little while, because he said he needed to go home and help his mother for a little while, as she was getting remarried to an older friend of dad's and he needed to be there to help them. She said she wasn't sad about it, because she had a feeling that he would come back. He did. So it impressed her that he took such good care of his family, even to the point of helping his sisters who had married alcoholics and often didn't have food to feed the many children they had. I heard from my cousin at the funeral how dad would come visit them one day, and if they didn't have any food in the refrigerator, dad would always be back the next day with groceries. And how much he and his siblings would look forward to seeing that car pull up in their driveway. not just because he knew it would mean food on the table the next day, but just to know someone loved them and cared about them. I remember dad telling me how, when this particular cousin's mother would be having another baby, dad would go pick up all the kids, bring them home and make sure they all had baths and something to eat until their mother came back home.

Also at the funeral, I heard one of his longest and closest friends speak about the prisoners of war that dad was around. He said many of the soldiers would not treat the prisoners (or the locals) very well, but dad was always respectful of them, and treated them with dignity.

We sure do miss you, daddy. But I know you're in a better place now, and for the first time in all the years I knew you, you have no pain at all now. Rest in peace, dad.

My dad

I know it's been a while since my last post, but it's been a difficult month. My dad, who is 85 years old, and who has been married to my mom for 48 years as of yesterday (Oct. 26), was admitted to hospice last week and will not be with us much longer. I'm so glad he made it through that anniversary for mom's sake. The hospice staff were so very sweet ... they had a cake and ice cream for him and mom, and they took pictures of them in his room.

It's very difficult to even type, as he's in such pain that I tell everyone that it would be easier to let him go than see him in such agony. But now in hospice, they are controlling his pain much better than they did in the hospital, so he's comfortable now. But he's also mostly sleeping now, too, and you cannot understnad what he says when he does try to talk. Today he slept through our entire visit, and his blood pressure is dropping, so we know it will be soon.

The saddest part to me is that he will never get to meet my little Maria. He absolutely adores children, and his grandchildren can do no wrong. One of the funniest things I can think of about him is, he was a very strict father. Ex-military, by-the-book, and a 'do as I say, not as I did' kind of dad. And he was stricter on me than on my brothers, because I'm a girl, and I was the baby. Ok, so not to the funny part yet ... his grandchildren can run through his house screaming at the top of their lungs, and he would sit back and say "that's just music to my ears!" My brother eloquently pointed out that it most certainly was NOT music when we did it! But thst's my dad.

Mom and I had to go through the bank box looking for his will, and we checked out all the things he had in there. He had some pennies in there ... one from 1900 and one from 1906. I didn't realize they were United States currency, as I had never seen that type before, until I read the writing on them. Pretty cool. And the only other penny he had in there was from ....... 1964. Guess what year I was born? Yep. So I WAS the favorite, right?!?!? Right!?!? Ha!

Dad was strict, but he was pretty cool sometimes. He was always good for a banana split at Mr. Smith's ice cream shop. And he loved to take us swimming at the military base where he retired from, and where he still worked civil service. He loved his family more than anything. I took Maya to see Omi today and she mentioned "Papa" more than once. I guess she was wondering where you were. I'll have to find some old pictures later to post so my children will know who Papa was and how much he loved them.

We love you, dad, and we will miss you.

Please help bring them home!

I am asking for your help to bring home the 5,000 Guatemalan orphans currently in process to be adopted by US parents.

Edited to remove personal commentary, as it just takes up time and space when you could be reading the linked site instead....

http://www.5000orphans.com/

ETA: The DOS has revised their statement and added verbiage saying they have asked that the current in-process cases be grandfathered in to the new "law" and be allowed to finish. While we would be thankful for that, it does nothing for the babies being born right now that will not have any other option to remain with the birthmother. The majority of adoption agencies have shut their doors to Guatemala for the time being, and it is unknown if or when they will be allowed to reopen. It breaks my heart to know that the Guatemalan government is not prepared at this point to step up to the plate and help care for their own. I look at my first daughter's laughing eyes and smiling face and cry when I think about what 'could have been' if she had remained in Guatemala. And it makes me very sad to think there is even a slight chance that we might not be able to bring home our second daughter at all.

2K

No, 2K is NOT a distance that I run. I don't even walk 2K if I can help it.

Maya started the new 2K program at a local church. She loves it! I cried. And Gran cried when I told her about it a few months ago. Gran kept Maya for us on Mon, Wed and Fri, and a friend kept her on Tues & Thurs. But the friend lives pretty far away, and we've had a couple of problems in the past (with another sitter) and had to scramble at the last minute for daycare. Once I had to stay home on LWOP as I didn't have any leave time left, but Maya was sick. Soooo, Gran is the one who actually looked into the church program for us, but she intended it to be a Tues/Thurs program only. I had already told E that I would prefer to just pay for 5 days and then just have the option to drop her off on MWF if Gran or Poppi is sick. But when it came time to enroll (we were number 23 on the waiting list when we signed up months ago), they had eliminated the TTh program and had begun a new 2K program. So Gran cried when I told her it was now 5 days. She knows she can still have Maya anytime she wants, but this does give us a sense of security if we need to keep her there. But Gran wants Maya to have that time with the other children, and to not miss out on whatever little projects they have going on.

And then it came time for her first day. We had visited the week before when they had the open house for parents, and Maya played in her room and met her teachers. Maya adjusts extremely well to most situations, so I knew she would be fine. But I wasn't . It was one of those "below the head" reactions. 'Below the head' means it doesn't involve my brain or my common sense. Those two told me she would do wonderful here, and that she would love meeting new children. But 'below the head', I was anxious and nervous and I just hated leaving her there that first day. Who knew I would turn into this quivering mass of emotions the minute I became a mommy? E and I walked Maya to her room that morning, and she looked around a little. Then when she realized we were leaving her there, she started crying. So we said goodbye to her and left (as they instructed us the children tend to recover faster if we don't prolong the goodbye.) That was one of the hardest things I have ever done. EVER. I was crying before we rounded the first corner. Then we had to stop by the director's office and paid our first month's bill, and turned in Maya's updated immunization form. I'm still crying the whole time I'm writing out the check. The director (and the rest of the staff, too) are all very sweet, and she kept telling me Maya will be fine, and she will have a good time. I KNEW all that! But I couldn't help the tears anyway. My baby is growing up so fast. Oh, and yes, she is just fine there, and she's made some new friends, and she is having a great time.

We got PA!!

We got US Preapproval (PA) today!! On to PGN!
This is Maria, Maya's little sister. I haven't posted her picture yet because it makes me nervous to do so. The adoption isn't final until her birthmother signs off one last time after we exit PGN (which we hope will only take the average 8 weeks to complete). But I'm very excited about getting PA! One step closer....

Isn't she a cutie? Everyone says she looks like Maya, but I don't see any resemblance at all. Other than they are both drop dead gorgeous, of course! :-)

I am worried about the current status of US adoptions in Guatemala right now. The atmosphere seems to be deteriorating daily with regards to anti-American sentiment. Rumors abound about the reasons behind American's adopting from Guatemala, plus the Hague treaty issues, plus the push by UNICEF to keep Guatemalan babies in Guatemala, regardless of their government's inability to care for these children. Yes, I think adoption processes could be greatly improved in Guatemala, and yes, I think there should be more controls over the lawyer's roles in adoptions, and yes, I think the government should do far more to assist the 75% of their population wayyy below poverty level. But dammit, NOT at the expense of the children who will die or suffer malnutrition or abuse because their gov't does not assume responsibility for them!! So, with all the current hullabaloo, I think it would be best if Maya stays home. I will NOT endanger her life, even for the opportunity to get to know her little sister before facing the big crowd at home. Hopefully things will improve after their elections in September, but if not, Maya will have to stay with Gran. I hope she understands one day.

Rant over, for the moment. I don't want to hijack my own thread with negativity. PA takes an average of 60 days now (up from 30 days when we adopted Maya), and today was either day 60 or 61 for us. An adoption forum that I joined had a bunch of people announcing PA today, and I was feeling quite left out. So I checked email one more time (have been checking daily for a couple of weeks now) and there it was! I'm so excited. I still have hopes of bringing Maria home this year, hopefully late November or December, so we can combine my 6 weeks of maternity leave with holiday leave. Otherwise I won't have any leave time at all over the holidays and will have more LWOP time. But, of course, I would fly to get her tomorrow if they would let me!

Oh, and E has 'officially' agreed on Maria B- (his mother's maiden name) for her name! I'm excited about that too! Maya's middle name is my maiden name, so I loved the idea of using a grandmother's maiden name for Maria's middle name. Her first name is for my mother (one of her many middle names), so it was only fair to use something from her other grandmother, aka "Gran".

I have really got to get started on Maya's big girl room so we can modify the nursery for Maria. Maybe this weekend .... I think this announcement is a great incentive for me to get started!

I'm soooo happy!!!

Un-named

Don't know what to call this one. Just general ramblings of an old lady, who is sick of bringing work home from the office, from missing lunch because of work, and who can no longer retire in 10 short years because she left the state retirement system to work closer to home, but doesn't seem to be home much more than when she commuted 3 hours a day. Sigh. I really don't hate my job, but I'm just annoyed at all the computer problems we've had at work, which really slows down the productivity, so I end up working longer and harder but not getting as much accomplished. So here I sit at 11:10 p.m., updating the blog because now my HOME laptop keeps kicking me out of excel. Sigh again. I guess it's not in the cards for me to actually finish the Medicaid reimbursement analysis I started oh-so-long-ago. I would eat something, but I ate a whole bag of almond m&ms already today. Not good for the old diet, huh?

Speaking of un-named, Eric agreed to my favorite choice for Maria's name! But again, we must remember that E will change his mind at the drop of a hat, no matter what he has committed to in the past. So we'll see if it lasts. He has agreed to it 2 other times, but changed his mind. We had sort of agreed on Anna Maria, but that just seems so bland compared to Maya's unique name ... Maya R-(my maiden name). Paired with our really common last name, poor Maria would probably be one of 100 of them in our state alone. So, I suggested again the Maria B-(Eric's mother's maiden name), which I really love and which his mother seems to love also. He mentioned tonight that he was ok with it. Don't know what changed his mind this time, but we'll see how long it lasts. I wouldn't rush out and get anything monogrammed with MBL on it just yet.

Let me see if I can find some cute pictures of Maya to post. bwahahahaha! I can ALWAYS find cute pictures of Maya to post!




Guess who figured out her tricycle/scooter thing?! Her feet still don't reach the pedals, but she learned how to 'walk' it up the small hill then lift her feet and just ride! She laughed and laughed and laughed. I just love that little grin she gets when she figures something out. Needless to say, this will require even more "outside" time than before. She sooo loves the outdoors, and I'm happy that she prefers that over watching tv inside, but I am just not an outdoorsy gal myself. I think I'm allergic to outside. Five minutes near the grass and I'm sneezing. Or if it's too hot, I'll sneeze. But I'll brave it to be able to get pictures like this! I just love that little kid of mine. She makes days like today worth it all ......

Her first "car date"!

Somehow I thought this would come much, much later in life, like when she's 20! But we were visiting friends last weekend and they have a 3 year old son. He's a real cutie, and he has one of those motorized jeeps. So he took Maya for a ride in their yard! It was the cutest thing EVER! Ok, so his mom actually had to run over and turn the steering wheel for him whenever he needed to turn, but he was pushing the pedal all by himself. They would be heading across the lawn and I would just watch them go, and Maya would yell "bye, mommy, bye!" And I imagined that same scene picturing her as a teenager. Oy! My heart ached, and she's only TWO!

But it was adorable enough for me to post the picture against my 'no other children' rule. Oh well, I might as well toss that rule ... I'm not sticking to it very well.

Oh, and this picture is a recreation of the actual event. The little boy really was driving Maya around, and she was just as happy as can be in the passenger seat. I mentioned "I wish we had taken pictures of that" several times, and so his dad finally got his camera and we went back outside. But this time Maya jumped in the driver's seat. I just can't get over how cute these kids were!!

Birthday parties galore!

Hmmm, what to do, what to do? Work on the spreadsheet I brought home from work, or update the blog? Work, or blog? hehehehe.... not much of a decision huh?

My problem comes, though, in trying to select pictures to post. I try not to include other children in my pictures here, as I wouldn't want someone posting Maya's pictures without me knowing it, but it's kind of hard to find a picture at a child's birthday party without other children in it! I'll have to break my own rule and post this one anyway.... this captures my baby's personality to a 'T'!




Yes, she does that backward fall into the pool all the time. And she usually precedes it with a "Watch! Mommy! Watch!" She's absolutely fearless when it comes to water. Which terrifies me with the big swimming pool right outside. Eric is supposed to get a lock for the pool gate, as she does know how to open doors now. And we have GOT to get her signed up for swimming lessons ASAP!

She also loves to face the water and sort of dive into the little pool face first. Either way, she always comes up laughing and smiling. The first time she did both stunts, she just about gave her old mom a heart attack!

Two years old. Have I mentioned she's TWO YEARS OLD now? I know I'm being repetitive when I say I just can't believe it. But truly, I can't believe it! I look at her now and see a young girl emerging. She has all but lost the baby-Maya look. Occasionally we'll see the open mouth, wide-eyed stare we knew and loved so well in all her pre-placement pictures. And oh, the memories that come rushing back. I'll just say that 2 years have never gone by that fast before in my entire 42 years. Wait ... I take it back. The first 9 months of those 2 years positively dragged and I thought I would die from the anticipation ... all we had were pictures of her those first 9 months. It was the moment we held her that time seemed to incrementally speed up, at approximately 10:15 a.m. on May 1, 2006, in the lobby of the Marriott hotel in Guatemala City. Whoever coined the phrase "time flies when you're having fun!" certainly knew what he was talking about!

Anyway, on to the birthday parties!

We had 13 people attend her birthday party at my parent's house on July 15th.
We had 31 people attend her birthday party at home on July 28th, and 21 people attended the party at home on July 29th. That little girl is very much loved by a lot of people! Only 3 people invited couldn't make it Saturday, and 17 couldn't make it Sunday (those 17 were only 2 families, however!) The parties at home were swimming parties, and we set up Maya's little shark pool beside the big pool. We had several children there around Maya's age, and they all seemed to enjoy both pools. But having the little pool was nice, so that they could get in and out as they pleased without an adult freaking out if they got near it (as we tend to do around the big pool). Both parties at home were 2:30 - 4:30, but of course family and friends hung out until close to (some even after) 6:00. Some people brought gifts, of course, even though I added "no gifts" to the invitations. I certainly understand wanting to bring presents, but honestly, her toy-cup overrunneth! Now mommy has to do a major clean out of toys this coming weekend. It's such a difficult thing to balance .. you want them to have it all, but not be greedy or selfish. You want them to always be happy, but to be humble. You want them to enjoy childhood, but not be a brat. You want them to be healthy, but to enjoy cake and ice cream and cookies and ... well, you get the idea.

All of her parties were "Nemo"-themed. I don't understand the facination with fish, but she's hooked! (pun intended...) My best toy-investments ever were 1) her $15 Target clearance-priced orange cat-chair, which she dearly loves and kisses so much that it's little nose and mouth are constantly brown instead of off-white; and 2) her $15 Belk cheap-plastic fish screen (shaped like a plasma tv, but quite simplistic) that she loves to turn on in the mornings. We count "1-2-3!", and then she yells "Wake up, fishies!" And then, as if by magic (or a very good mommy), the light comes on and the fishies start 'swimming' across the screen. I can't tell you the wondrous joy I get from watching her little face light up from those two items. She has other favorite toys, of course, like the meowing cat that Auntie Lisa gave her, and her teddy bear that she wakes up to each morning in her crib, and any bag that has ever been given to her. She loves bags. And her newest birthday gifts, of which her favorite seem to be the fold-out Dora couch, the little veterinary shop with the 6 doors that lock and unlock with color-coded keys (given to her by a coworker of mine), and the little pet shop parlor with the tiny hair dryer that really makes noise (given to her by a friend of mine and her 3 girls, who watch Maya on Tuesdays and Thursdays).

I could go on and on ... and I think I did! But I have enjoyed seeing my daughter have such a wonderful time with her very large, loving family and her friends. And I look forward to the day when we can finally bring her little sister home. These kids are my life now, and I wouldn't trade it for all the riches in the world. Being a part of their lives is something I will treasure for as long as I live, and I hope they come to know that one day.

It's official. She's TWO!

Our first picture:


July 26,2006



Maya turns 2:




Happy birthday, sweet Maya! I can't believe you're already 2! Mama and daddy love you, sweet baby girl!

Tagged!

I've been tagged! And I didn't even know it until much later!! Freaky, huh? LOL!

So, today's post will be all about me. Here's what I have been "tagged" to do (by Sarah, who is mom to Lily, one of the two cutest baby girls that have ever come out of Guatemala!)

1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.
2. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they have been tagged, and to read your blog.

#1. I am the 'indecisive' queen. I hate making decisions. Just tell me what you want to do, where you want to go, what you want to eat. It will not be rude. It will help me out GREATLY if you make the decision for me. Honestly. I mean it!

#2. I'd really love to lose about a gazillion pounds. But I'd be happy with 30.

#3. Even though I am adament about taking Maya back to Guatemala with us when we go pick up Maria, I'm scared. I'm worried we'll lose her somehow, or that she'll pitch a fit in public in front of people who might not like us being there to start with, or that E will be miserable because of how much work it will be to care for two in a foreign country. ButI desperately want her to be there with us. I cannot imagine meeting Maria without Maya being with us. She's part of me now, and I just can't leave her behind.

#4. I wish I could be a stay at home mom and teach, play with, hang out with, and just LOVE my babies all day. But alas, it's not gonna happen. I must work. Sometimes I resent my job because I have to be there. I actually enjoy the work, but I would much rather be home with Maya, and soon Maria. It scares me sometimes when I realize how little control I have over their lives while they are being watched by others. I know without a doubt they are receiving excellent care, but I still wish it could be ME that provides it. I guess I'll just hope for grandbabies to watch one day, while MY babies go to work. Or even better, if they happen to be stay-at-home moms and I can just be there and enjoy all of them!

#5. Sigh. I'm a shopaholic. I admit it. I love to shop.

#6. I'm VERY excited about having Maya's birthday parties this weekend, but I'm disappointed in myself for admitting I can't do two birthday cakes and work. So I ordered them today at a local grocery store. I promised myself I would make ALL of Maya's birthday cakes. I mean, it's the reason why I took those cake decorating classes in the first place, right? Even way before I even thought about having kids! But I didn't even make it through 2 years. Now, to make myself feel better, I'll go look at the pictures below of ALL the wonderful cakes and cupcakes I made for her 1st birthday party last year! I can be pretty unforgiving with myself if I feel I haven't lived up to my standards!

#7. Peanut M&Ms and Almond Joys are my all-time FAVORITE candy. I will admit I hide food from E occasionally. I vowed to love, honor and cherish for the rest of my life. I said NOTHING about sharing my chocolate!

#8. I will never, ever regret adopting my two babies at this age, but if I had the chance to erase 10 years of my life, I would do it, provided I could end up in this same place with these exact two baby girls. I always swore I would never wait as long as my parents did to have children. But guess what? I'm 4 years older than my mother was when I was born. When I received all of the immigration paperwork back that we had submitted in Houston, I found out that Maya's maternal birth-grandmother is only about 5 years older than me. But on the positive side, it's much more common these days to find older parents like myself. When we first visited our adoption agency, we were not the oldest potential parents there!

And a bonus one ....
#9. I have been lucky in my choice of friends. I have awesome friends. One left over from high school, some from my first job in state government almost 20 years ago, some from newer jobs along the way, some from church. I am blessed by my friends. Some I don't even speak with on a regular basis, as life is busy for us all, but I know without a doubt that I can call any of them in a pinch and they would drop everything to come help me. I love them all! I pray that Maya and Maria will be so lucky. I know friends can lead you down good or bad paths, and I hope they will have the ability to discern which is the correct path for them. Now, having said that, I'll have to admit that I don't know a single person personally who has a blog!! So I can't exactly forward the 'tag' I received! Oh well, maybe one of them will start one and I can then pass this along.....

As Maya says ... night, night!

Update on Maria!

I got a call from our agency on Friday to let us know we were kicked out of PGN for no preapproval. We knew that would happen, of course, but my problem with it was the fact that I didn't even know we were IN PGN! Which I told Missy when she called. I hadn't even heard that we were out of Family Court yet. DNA testing happened on June 20, and we got the results around the 26th. We knew that once we were out of family court, our attorney would submit our paperwork to PGN and to the US embassy at the same time. So we knew that we would be kicked out of PGN for not having preapproval yet, but our attorney did this in the hopes that if we're missing any other paperwork, he'll find out now rather than wait to be kicked out after we receive PA. It has been taking pretty close to 60 days to get US Preapproval (PA), so we don't expect that until late August. Hopefully the rest will go like clockwork, and "the rest" includes the following wishlist:
- receive PA by the end of August
- be resubmitted to PGN by the end of August
- no more kickouts!
- be out of PGN by the end of October
- received the reissued birth certificate, the visa/passport and our pink slip with our appointment date by Thanksgiving
- travel to Guatemala to pick up Maya's baby sister by late November or early December!!

We were excited to get this particular attorney in Guatemala, so we'll just have to deal with the lack of up-to-date information. He works quickly, but we'll probably have to wait until we pick Maria up to learn any details about her birthmother or the various processing dates.

Well, I'm off to get a good night's sleep for once. It's going to be a busy week with Maya's birthday coming up, and her parties next weekend. I've been 'tagged' by Sarah and will be answering the tag in my next post!

Party pics!

Maya had such a good time in the water! I just can't believe she's turning 2 already. Seems like just yesterday we were in Guatemala picking her up.

This was the party we had at Omi and Papa's house on Sunday, July 15th. I told Omi we would leave the little swimming pool there so we could use it when we come back to visit, but Maya had so much fun with it, we decided to bring it home and use it at her next two parties. We have an inground pool, but Maya hates to wear the floaties and/or other paraphernalia, so we thought she'd have a lot more fun with this pool. I'm glad we did, because we've been out 'swimming' in it twice now since the party, and it's so much easier than dragging everything to the big pool and constantly worrying about Maya jumping in the deep end.

Getting behind already!

So it's been 10 days since my last post and I feel like I'm getting behind in this already.

We had the first of Maya's birthday parties today at my parent's house. Yes, I said the FIRST of Maya's parties. That little girl is having THREE birthday parties. Last year's 68 people were a little much for me to handle in one day, so I decided to split them up into 2 different parties this year. But then I was worried my parents (Omi and Papa to Maya) wouldn't be able to make the trip up here for one of the parties. Since I didn't want them to miss out completely, I decided to have a party for my old hometown friends at their house. It was really fun, but exhausting, and HOT! I remember being so excited when I found out my new baby would have a July birthday! My birthday is in December, and boy does that stink! So I was really excited about having swimming parties, and buying summer stuff for Maya's birthday. What I didn't think about was ... it's HOT in July in the south!

Anyway, Maya had a ball playing in the water! We got a small inflatable pool for my parent's house, and a few different sprinklers for the bigger girls to play in. The minute I started putting water in the pool, Maya headed for it and stepped right in the water ... shoes, clothes, regular diaper and all. My mom tried to get her out, but at that point she was already wet, so I said to just take her shoes off and let her play. I did, however, wait a little too late to change the regular diaper to a swimmy diaper, and the gel stuff busted out. All I can say about that is .... EWWWWW. That gel is some gross stuff! The other problem we had was ants. Lots and lots and LOTS of ants! I didn't see an ant bed where we first put the pool, but all of a sudden a swarm of ants started climbing one side into the pool. So mom went to get the ant spray while E and I dumped water out to move the pool, while trying to keep Maya out of the ants. We ended up having to move it again a little later to the other side of the pool. It didn't even slow her down much.... she just LOVED that little pool! So we emptied it and brought it home. She likes it better than our big pool because she doens't have to wear swimmies or a lifevest or anything. She was just too adorable today! And this birthday I actually managed to get pictures. Last year it was too busy with too many people.

It took the other girls a while to get in the water ... I thought they weren't going to do it at all. But they finally got around the big water ball sprinkler and had fun. Omi got Maya a cake with fish on it for her birthday. I made an Almond Cream Cheese Pound cake with White Chocolate icing for everyone else. It's my most requeted cake, and really good!

Packing up was a nightmare. Luckily a couple of my friends stayed to help. We finally got on the road close to 6:00, and E drove faster than I had ever known him to. I didn't mind, since we got home around 7:15. Maya was sooooo worn out that she didn't even make it out of the driveway before she fell asleep! E took her out to start the van and get her settled in her carseat, and all I did was throw out what was left of the cake I made, pack up the rest of Maya's cake, collect the few things we had left inside and say goodbye to mom and dad. I opened the door to the van and little Miss 2-year-old was fast asleep. She slept all the way home, and then was wide awake when we turned on to our street. ugh. We had hoped to put her straight into bed, but no such luck. So we stayed up a while and played and watched some Wiggles, and then she got real quiet and rubbed her eye a few times. So I put her to bed, but she didn't care for that idea and started crying. We decided she really needed to go to sleep (around 9:00), so we just waited and let her settle herself down. It didn't take too long for her to drift back off.

I got some great pictures today, but not sure how many I'll post here. After we finally changed Maya's diaper to a swimmy diaper, we didn't bother putting her bathing suit on over it. She had such a wonderful time, but I just don't think I want to post pictures of my near-naked baby on the internet. We'll see if I have any good ones when I finally download them.

Too Pooped to Party

A friend keeps Maya for us on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and she sent me this picture at work. She said Maya was a little tired today, and took two catnaps in addition to her usual nap. I think Eric forgot to warn her that Maya got to bed really late last night after the big 4th of July celebration. Isn't this the cutest thing you have ever seen?!?!

I was reading another blog about a mom adopting from Guatemala and she was just describing her first visit trip to adopt a little 1 year old girl. I truly admire those who can visit and then leave and come home. I just don't think I have it in me. While I would have LOVED to have held Maya during those long, agonizing, excruciating months of waiting, I just couldn't do it. I couldn't hand her back to that hogar. And we are definitely not in a position where I could just stay and foster her myself as others have done. So we will not be visiting Maria, either. I'm just not that strong.

Speaking of Maria, the discussion continues about her name. We had one heck of a time agreeing on Maya's name. Her middle name is my maiden name. But we argued and discussed, discussed and argued, and it was so hard to agree! My alltime favorite name choice was Sarah Elisabeth, after my paternal grandmother. My cousins and I used to argue when we were young about who was going to have a baby girl first and use that name for our daughter. Well, at 41, I became a mother first and wouldn't you know it? Eric refused to even consider it. He didn't like it. His choice was Savannah. And why, you ask? Just because he liked it. I hated it. We had agreed on Maya as a middle name early on in the process, as we (well, mainly me) wanted to give her one name that reflected her Guatemalan heritage. I wanted her other name to reflect her new family roots, but that didn't appear likely to happen, since Eric didn't like any of our family names (his side or mine). His grandmother's names were Madge and Ruby. I told him that Ruby is once again a popular name, but no dice. And to be honest, it's not my favorite, either. Eric's niece already has one of his mother's names, so he wouldn't consider that, either. We didn't agree on anything until one night when we were out with his coworkers, eating ribs, and we were discussing our naming dilemma. One of the bright souls there finally suggested that since Maya is the only name we can agree on, why not use it for her first name? We just looked at each other and wondered why we hadn't thought of that?! So then the discussion flowed around middle name choices. I don't know how my maiden name entered the discussion, but once it came out, everyone at the table loved the combination. So, there you have it. The story of Maya's name.

Needless to say, picking a name for Maria has been just as painful. We agreed some time ago that we didn't want Maya to be an only child, so we had discussed a few potential names for her little sister. At one point, I brought up Maria B, with the 'B' name being Eric's mother's maiden name. I thought it would be great for each of my girls to have an unusual middle name that was also a family name. 'Maria' is for my mom (one of her middle names), but also a popular hispanic name. Anyway, at that point in time, Eric actually somewhat agreed to it. So when the time came to start the next adoption process, we were matched very early with a beautiful baby girl from Poptun, Guatemala. Then the naming dance began once again. The usual standbys came up, Savannah and Sarah, and were promptly nixxed once again. Then Eric came into the room one day and says he has the "perfect name" for our new daughter..... Maria! I laughed and said 'ok'. Turns out he was serious. To this day he does not remember our previous discussion about Maria B. So no, he no longer likes the 'B' part, so the search is on for a middle name. So far Anna Maria is the current favorite, just because we both like how it flows, and neither of us hates it. My choice would be Maria Elizabeth, Maria for my mom and Elizabeth for me ... my middle name before I dropped it when we wed. No such luck. Eric is currently trying to convince me to use Maria Katarina, which I don't hate, but I like Anna Maria better than that. I will still call her Maria, despite the well-intentioned advice from friends who have been called by their middle name all their lives, and who insist it's not a nice thing to do. But Maria Anna doens't have the same flowing sound, and I definitely want to use Maria. We also discussing using R again for Maria .. my maiden name. Then they would have the same initials, and we could stop racking our brains for name options. But we have definitely not agreed on anything definite. Wish us luck....

Happy 4th!

Not only was my little (almost) 2 year old not afraid of the fireworks, she practically fell asleep during them! She was so cute ... she swam and ate and played and danced and had a great time at Lisa and Robert's house. Then Robert started the fireworks a little early so that she could see them before we had to leave. She oohed and ahhed and went "wow!" when she saw them. But after about 1/2 hour, she just couldn't hold her head up any more. Bless her heart ... so I changed her into her pjs and we loaded up the minivan and started home. I'd say she got about 1 mile down the road before her head nodded. I can't wait to get the pictures downloaded .. we got a GREAT video of her dancing!

It was a great day, even if I did have to work. I'm trying to save ALL of my leave time for when we go back to Guatemala to pick up Maya's little sister, Maria. Right now it's looking like late October to late November for a potential pick up date. But of course there is really no way to know for sure. I can't wait to travel back and take Maya with us. I know she won't remember any of the trip when she's older, but I will! And I'll take plenty of pictures, of course. And as a friend once said, it's a family that we're building, and Maya is part of that family. We finally got her passport in the mail a couple of weeks ago. So anyway, I worked from 7:00 until 1:00 and then came home to spend the rest of the day with my Maya Papaya. I just adore hanging out with that little girl!

I'll come back and include pictures after we get them downloaded. She was too cute in her little ladybug swimsuit! How did I ever get so lucky to be mom to the best baby in the whole world?!!